Adulting

Beautiful Sun & Clouds

On Saturday, I went to the Toyota dealership with Keren, who is trying to buy a used car. Wow, adulting is rough.

I don’t know what to say. I wasn’t even the one buying the car, and I was exhausted. Three different men tried very hard to sell vehicles out of her price range. They were all very persuasive in their own ways and made buying a car sound easy.  All I did was sit there, smile and nod, but in my head I kept thinking: why are you guys trying so hard, and making it so difficult? I know they make money off of commission, but it was kind of ridiculous. I was texting my dad the entire time about the cars and Keren called her parents multiple times throughout the process. We (haha, I mean she. I was only there for moral support) ended up not buying any of the cars, which was fine. I’m sure God has the perfect car for her, and it’s somewhere out there. That day, I gained deeper appreciation for how blessed I am to have for the decisions I do not have to make 😊

Too Many Choices

But this reminds me. Let’s talk about the way people talk out here. I know that I don’t enjoy hyperboles and exaggerations, but sometimes the way people talk here gets on my nerves. How can you have five best friends, three favourite books, and burn waffles with your bare hands? Yeah, I guess it can be funny, but I’m just not a fan. Best literally means “the most excellent, effective, or desirable.” Were we to graph excellence, you would see only one maxima. Unless you’re talking about the local maxima, which there can be several, but there’s still only one absolute maximum. It’s fine. But it’s not. I guess part of the growing process is to learn to live with people who express themselves differently.

Another part of adulting is finding a new church and community. In the past month, I’ve visited five different churches, hoping to find a good fit. This Sunday, I visited Nona Church, and there wasn’t anything crazy or mind-blowing about the church. Except for one line in the message.

Pastor Colin described church that shed new light. He said, “Church is not a restaurant. Church is a potluck. And you’re invited.”

I realized that in the past year of church-hopping, I’ve had the church as a restaurant mentality. I’ve been looking for a church that meets my needs, serves the dishes I enjoy, and has good customer service. But just like my mom told me, church is not all about looking for a place where I will get fed and satisfied. I need to be in a community where I can serve and bring the gifts and talents to contribute to the kingdom. Like a potluck. SO I felt convicted to help with Nona Church’s Fall Festival that afternoon, where I helped set up and cut out all the tattoos for the kids. Please pray for discernment as I find a local church to bring food to the kingdom potluck. 

This Would be Backwards

After work on Monday, a bunch of us interns went to Disney to hear Lauren Daigle sing at the Food & Wine Festival in Epcot. It’s technically free, but you’d have to first get into Disney, which is not free. To be honest, I was just along for the ride; I’m not a giant fan of Lauren Daigle, but I know a few of her songs, so I thought why not. Also, bragging rights. And I’m glad I went.

We saw her on September 9^th, which is also her birthday. She sang three concerts that evening, and we attended the last one at 8pm. I heard that Lauren always shared the gospel at her concerts, but since people are not allowed to proselytize on Disney grounds, she got creative with sharing Jesus.

Lauren Dressed as Minnie

She ended the concert with “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus” and also clearly communicated through the music that her life was evidence of God’s work. She gave her audience a beautiful birthday present, which sounds kind of strange… people usually receive presents on their birthdays. But I think it makes sense. She did what she loves most (sing/make music) to the one she loves most (Jesus), and I think that is the best way to spend a birthday, while proclaiming the love of her Savior to a crowd of people! I would love to do something like that for my birthday. It’s like the Pianoguys, but next level, ya know?

UGH and can I talk about her relationship with her band??? THEY ARE FAMILY, and that’s the power of music. It was a timely reminder of what it means to belong. Belonging is not fitting in or pretending or shipping it. It’s about being vulnerable, getting uncomfortable, and being present with other people without sacrificing who we are (paraphrased from Brené Brown). Music is a space where it’s easy for me to belong, because you simply can’t pretend or “fit in.” It’s easy to be vulnerable, improvise uncomfortably, and be present. Those are all necessary components of music, because if you’re not present, you simply cannot play music with others. You’ll miss notes, and cues, and beats. And of course you can’t sacrifice who you are when playing music. You are there BECAUSE of the unique skills and talents you bring to the band/group/ensemble. You belong. I guess I’m still struggling with the question of whether or not I belong here, in Orlando, in the internship. Ann reminded me that transitions can take a long time, even longer than a year, and that’s OK.

That's a strange note to end on. Here's a picture before sunrise earlier this week. The sky here fascinates me.

Happy Wednesday!